Seeing

            Having been in Manila for 110 days, I feel better than before. But old habits threaten me. I should begin to paste some of my plans, old and new.

I came here to make human connection. There is enough to be made. I need to just keep my head.

An insufferable corporate girl

Today I met an insufferable corporate girl who clearly made an impression on me. She was on transmit most of the time. We met for almost an hour exactly.

Her confidence was galling.

She achieves in some corporate ways of imposing her will on the world.

I watched Star Wars. It was fine.

This time in my life was dislocated. I spoke to some certain in their ways and in their values, a life privileged from birth who rewarded hard work and more. 

Seeking to Write

Liquid Girl lives in my thoughts but only because I let her. In welcoming her in, I am really fleeing from pain.

One response to pain is to flee. Flee to a safe place, a metaphorical cave away from people and the chance of crushing miscommunication, of utter... And then what? I will be rotting in the ground in 30 years or less.

One response to pain is... action? Improvement? Piety?

I cannot wake up each day wondering what to do. Let's look at my Wunderlist. 

Six items today. Reading my Year 13 texts looks ideal. I really need to email Brian and Nick to ask what texts are going to be studied in the new year.

I am looking at the Orwell essays. That is... something that I want to look at another time. This is not for me. And it is technical.

I sent emails to Nick and Brian asking about the books I should read. I was a little pointed in my ones to Brian. Hopefully that will come across well to him - maybe it won't. I wrote it anyway.

My Wunderlist has so few tasks left on it. I do not have a happy relationship with that to-do list at the moment. I am in a period of transition.

I am seeing Brian in about 90 minutes. That is cool. Showing and walking will be my aim.

There is nothing rhythmic in this writing because it is a necessary toil.