As I grow more tired, I speak more.
The mind cannot be controlled. It seems I must concentrate on something. I am the windows worried about Utter.
Boundaries are necessary for the world outside.
I used to feel that an understanding of philosophy would give me a happier take on the world. But:
1) My network did not know philosophy enough.
2) I did not engage with philosophy of the soul and mind enough.
I read my old diaries and was surprised how clearly I wrote.
I often overcommunicate. I speak too many words. Instead, might I say as little as possible?
I still read even in this busy time. I spend even longer looking at miniatures, planning future collections.
I do not speak to my partner and myself with the kindness we deseserve.
My mother is travelling to France, unable to contact me, but happily living boundaries in our relationship.
My health is OK at the moment, although I could run a little more in the gym.
Sometimes my more feckless moments impact me 48 hours later. Realise that.
There is an uncomfortable intensity swallowing me from this huge monitor. It is rare that I dedicate the entirety of my effort and mind towards something.
I was meant to play some 40k with a dude in BGC today. We have not contacted each other. I am overwhelmed by my small hobby space, and the difficulty taking miniatures out of boxes.
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When I close my eyes and open a door in my mindpalace, I am greeted too often by the same experiences.
I feel like I want to read and run more. I have moved away from that, and I think that is impacting me.
I need to feel some stress. I need to realise that I want to listen.
Sit with stress.
I have 73 tasks on a Tuesday.
Over 7 to 8 days I have been at least 75 in my sleeping. There is much to be said in that.
I have not emotionally been able to 'deal with my eating'.
I have struggled to run 25 minutes this week.
I played a gig with minimal stress in comparison to before.
I... want to feel happy!
Over the past few weeks I have spoken about how I cannot control my mind. I am hostage to my body.
Hostage to my body.
I played BG3 yesterday, and finally found the evil tomes.
I want to write somewhat about my school experience.
I wrote a
When I have so much on my plate, I cannot possibly write more.
Therefore, I worked quite hard today on catching up with stuff. Doing so cleared my mind somewhat.
As folks say, we are busy in this school. Is that find? I think perhaps so.
